{"title":"The Classics","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.0pt; font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial; color: #3d2b1f; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA;\"\u003eOur core range. Approachable origins, familiar meals, and the kind of profiles that made Fart2Table what it is today. Start here if this is your first jar. Come back when it isn’t.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"taco-tuesday","title":"Taco Tuesday","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eBean-forward. Spice-driven. A Tuesday tradition, bottled for posterity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eEvery Tuesday, something magical happens. The ingredients align. The seasoning lands. And nature, doing what nature does, produces something that cannot be ignored.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Taco Tuesday batch is our most beloved classic — a bright, assertive profile with a distinct cumin-forward nose and what our tasting panel describes as \"a finish that stays with you, whether you invited it to or not.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThis is not a complicated jar. It does not pretend to be. It is Tuesday, in a jar, and it is everything that implies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303277478028,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/tacotuesday_5afcc84b-22b3-414b-9aea-4b2bfec2343a.gif?v=1775503136"},{"product_id":"chili-night-reserve","title":"Chili Night Reserve","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eBold. Layered. Catastrophically underestimated. Our best-reviewed batch.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThere is a reason serious collectors return to the Chili Night Reserve year after year. It is not subtle. It does not try to be. It is the kind of product that enters a room before you do.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eDeveloped over a slow-cooked evening with three types of bean, ground chuck, and a seasoning packet that punched considerably above its weight class, the Chili Night Reserve represents the upper limit of what a Thursday evening can produce.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eOur tasting notes describe it as “magnificently aggressive.” We stand by that completely.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303362609292,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/chili_f043b0e1-6069-4ecc-ab37-40fbba7f69e4.gif?v=1775503518"},{"product_id":"gas-station-hot-dog","title":"Gas Station Hot Dog","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eA chaotic classic. No apologies. No explanation. No survivors.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWe will be honest with you: the Gas Station Hot Dog batch was not planned. It was not curated. It was a Tuesday afternoon decision that nobody should have made and everyone did anyway.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe resulting jar is, by every measurable standard, a disaster... and yet, among certain collectors, it has achieved a kind of cult status that we did not anticipate and have fully embraced.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThis is the most honest product we make. There is nothing sophisticated about it. It tastes, in the abstract sense, of regret and convenience. We are very proud of it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303509966988,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/hotdog_8bfeb00d-83b3-4074-bff4-8010c57f50a9.gif?v=1775504636"},{"product_id":"garlic-pasta-bomb","title":"Garlic Pasta Bomb","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eItalian-inspired. Aglio e olio energy. A fragrant evening, preserved.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWe will be honest with you: the Gas Station Hot Dog batch was not planned. It was not curated. It was a Tuesday afternoon decision that nobody should have made and everyone did anyway.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe resulting jar is, by every measurable standard, a disaster... and yet, among certain collectors, it has achieved a kind of cult status that we did not anticipate and have fully embraced.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThis is the most honest product we make. There is nothing sophisticated about it. It tastes, in the abstract sense, of regret and convenience. We are very proud of it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303521697932,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/garlicpasta_00759930-14bf-458c-8d5e-ba6a471d6152.gif?v=1775504544"},{"product_id":"indian-buffet-bomb","title":"Indian Buffet Bomb","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eA chaotic classic. No apologies. No explanation. No survivors.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Indian Buffet Bomb is not a jar for the uninitiated. It is a jar that requires respect, prior experience, and ideally some warning to anyone in the immediate vicinity.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eDeveloped following an all-you-can-eat buffet experience of rare ambition - multiple rounds of saag paneer, chicken tikka masala, daal, and a lamb vindaloo that, in hindsight, probably deserved more consideration - this batch represents one of the most complex profiles in our entire range.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial; color: #3d2b1f; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA;\"\u003eOur tasting panel requested hazard pay. We denied it. The jar is extraordinary.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303528579212,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/indianbuffet_a926ce90-6f18-425f-92a1-4e5b287a885d.gif?v=1775504737"},{"product_id":"steakhouse-reserve","title":"Steakhouse Reserve","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eRich. Sophisticated. Ribeye-sourced. Our most distinguished offering. Decant before gifting.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Steakhouse Reserve is Fart2Table’s finest expression. It is the jar you open when the occasion calls for something that takes itself seriously - or rather, when the occasion calls for something that takes itself seriously despite every indication that it should not.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eSourced following a steakhouse dinner of genuine quality - a 16oz dry-aged ribeye, compound butter, a wedge salad nobody asked for but everyone ate, a side of truffle fries that were worth every penny, and a bottle of Cabernet that was very good and probably wasted on us - this batch carries the weight of a serious evening.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe label is matte black. The wax seal is burgundy. The presentation is that of a product worth considerably more than it contains. That is intentional. That is the entire point. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial; color: #3d2b1f; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA;\"\u003eWe recommend decanting for three seconds before gifting. Or not. The jar is sealed. There is nothing to decant. But the act of suggesting it is part of the experience.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303621017740,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/stteakhouse_e19346da-dafd-4a2b-be97-654e5322b369.gif?v=1775504968"},{"product_id":"seafood-boil-edition","title":"Seafood Boil Edition","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eOceanic complexity. Butter-forward. A coastal evening in a jar.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Seafood Boil Edition was developed during what our estate team describes as “a very good summer weekend and a very consequential Sunday morning.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eIt opens with an immediate maritime character - something between low tide and a very enthusiastic shrimp - and develops into a warmer, butter-forward mid-palate that is, by any objective measure, more complex than it has any right to be.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWe served this to a tasting panel of four. Two of them walked out. The other two requested a second jar. We consider both reactions a success.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303642382476,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/seafood_62bd1aa7-e0ff-4ff1-9379-4c3a5c7cadcb.gif?v=1775505091"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/collections\/Comfort_food_classics_on_wooden_table.png?v=1775509224","url":"https:\/\/fart2table.com\/collections\/the-classics.oembed","provider":"Fart 2 Table","version":"1.0","type":"link"}