{"title":"The Classic Jars","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhere every collector begins. The Classic Jars are our foundational expressions: unpretentious, honest, and produced in the volume that only a weeknight can sustain. No aging. No ceremony. Just dinner, and its consequences.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"taco-tuesday","title":"Taco Tuesday","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eBean-forward. Spice-driven. A Tuesday tradition, bottled for posterity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eEvery Tuesday, something magical happens. The ingredients align. The seasoning lands. And nature, doing what nature does, produces something that cannot be ignored.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Taco Tuesday batch is our most beloved classic — a bright, assertive profile with a distinct cumin-forward nose and what our tasting panel describes as \"a finish that stays with you, whether you invited it to or not.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThis is not a complicated jar. It does not pretend to be. It is Tuesday, in a jar, and it is everything that implies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303277478028,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/tacotuesday_5afcc84b-22b3-414b-9aea-4b2bfec2343a.gif?v=1775503136"},{"product_id":"gas-station-hot-dog","title":"Gas Station Hot Dog","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eA chaotic classic. No apologies. No explanation. No survivors.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWe will be honest with you: the Gas Station Hot Dog batch was not planned. It was not curated. It was a Tuesday afternoon decision that nobody should have made and everyone did anyway.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe resulting jar is, by every measurable standard, a disaster... and yet, among certain collectors, it has achieved a kind of cult status that we did not anticipate and have fully embraced.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThis is the most honest product we make. There is nothing sophisticated about it. It tastes, in the abstract sense, of regret and convenience. We are very proud of it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303509966988,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/hotdog_8bfeb00d-83b3-4074-bff4-8010c57f50a9.gif?v=1775504636"},{"product_id":"garlic-pasta-bomb","title":"Garlic Pasta Bomb","description":"\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eItalian-inspired. Aglio e olio energy. A fragrant evening, preserved.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eThe Garlic Pasta Bomb begins, as all great things do, with restraint. Four cloves, the recipe says. Our estate team has never once used four cloves. They use the entire head, and then they look at the second head, and then they use that as well.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWhat emerges is a jar of remarkable persistence. It arrives slowly. It announces itself in the hallway before it enters the room. Collectors describe the finish as \"lingering,\" then, some hours later, as \"still lingering.\" It has been known to outlast the relationship that produced it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 3.0pt 0in 3.0pt 0in;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 10.5pt; color: #3d2b1f;\"\u003eWe recommend decanting in a well-ventilated space, ideally one you do not own. Pairs beautifully with an apology.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Fart 2 Table","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47303521697932,"sku":null,"price":16.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0760\/7002\/7404\/files\/garlicpasta_00759930-14bf-458c-8d5e-ba6a471d6152.gif?v=1775504544"}],"url":"https:\/\/fart2table.com\/collections\/the-classic-jars.oembed","provider":"Fart 2 Table","version":"1.0","type":"link"}